Hilarious

I am bisexual.

Well, bi-curious.

Well, let's just say I've not been curious for a while. So I'm what is left over once the curiosity has been assuaged. I guess what I'm saying is even though strawberry is my favourite flavour if chocolate was all that was left in the freezer then I'd have some. My preference is definitely for strawberry. Especially strawberry with long blonde hair, pretty eyes and a great body. I had some strawberry like that once. I think her name was Laura. Yes, definitely Laura. I had some other strawberry that had short brown hair and was quite feisty, her name was Laura too. Anyway, I digress. Boarding school is probably why I don't mind chocolate. Well, boarding school and a very sexually liberal upbringing. Cheers Mum and Dad! I wonder what happened to my last scoop of chocolate. He's probably earning a crust in the city somewhere. Little rascal.

Someone in our circle of friends told the twatmate that I'd batted for both sides once. Apparently his reaction was absolute disbelief and they had to console him by lying to him and saying they were winding him up.

The other day I told him this was actually true. He was shocked. It started with me winding him up about it and saying I was considering bringing a man back home. He begged me not to bring a man back to the flat. This was his reason:

"Please don't bring a man back. I am not homophobic, but the thought of men having sex is repulsive to me."

He said this with a completely straight face. The definition of homophobia in the dictionary is fear or contempt of homosexuals and homosexual practices. Perhaps they use a different dictionary in the north?